5 Steps to Starting Fresh in Your Relationship
All relationships change over time. They can become stronger and more loving, but sometimes a crisis can threaten a relationship. Harsh words get said, maybe one of you did something unthinkingly, and there have been unintended consequences. How can you make a fresh start and put your relationship in a better state of repair? Follow these expert tips to start afresh and make things better.
1. Apologize
Regardless of who started it or who said what, apologize right now. Apologize sincerely and without reservation and without expecting (or demanding) an apology in return. How the other person reacts is not your stuff. Your stuff is to take responsibility for your part in what happened. Apologizing is the necessary first step in clearing away the hurt and anger of a relationship breach.
2. Leave the Past Behind
A fresh start means leaving the words and actions of the past behind you. Walk away from bad feelings, and don’t take any sense of grievance or being wronged into the new relationship. If the breach happened because of something you did or said, it’s up to you to leave the guilt behind too. Once you have apologized and cleared the air, there’s no room for negative emotions. A clean slate means moving on.
3. Trust Each Other
The foundation of a good relationship is trust. You believe in the other person-you have faith in them, and you will support them without reservation. A fresh start means letting yourself trust again.
4. Get Some Perspective
One of the things that distinguish a stable, long-term relationship is perspective. It’s human nature to get irritated, but you need to be able to let the little things go and focus on what’s really important. Accept that people and relationships change over time and embrace the good things you have.
5. Act with Love
When it comes right down to it, love really is all you need. Act kindly and lovingly. Treat your partner as you would like to be treated yourself. Before you get irritated because they forgot to take the trash out again, take a breath, and remember why you love them.
Most of the time, people slip up or do something hurtful out of carelessness, not because they meant to be mean or wanted you to suffer. Chances are they were distracted or simply didn’t think. Be calm and tell your partner how you’re feeling without blaming, and they will likely be horrified they hurt you. Act with love, don’t assume the worst and be honest.